Sunday, February 16, 2003

Guilty pleasures
A few of mine...
Those cheeseburger links they sell at Sunoco stations
"The Official Fanfiction University of Middle-earth" by Camilla Sandman
Certain 80's music
and I even have a link to a guilty pleasure on the left:
The Red Songbook of Westmarch .
A sample from that last.....

SAURON
to the tune of GASTON
from the Disney animated feature BEAUTY AND THE BEAST
(as sung by the Witch-King of Angmar)

Sunday, November 28, 1999 by William H. Hsu

"I have still this to say... you do not know your peril!"
- The Two Towers, Ch. 7 (Helm's Deep)

SCENE: The Barad-Dur, some years after the Quest of Erebor. SAURON and
the WITCH-KING OF ANGMAR are taking afternoon tea on a platform near
the pinnacle.

"SAURON: Who do they think they are?! The White Council has tangled
with the wrong Maia! No one dares to assail Sauron!
WITCH-KING: Heh, darn right!
SAURON: Assaulted! Thwarted! Driven out of Dol Guldur! Why, it's
more than I can bear!
WITCH-KING: Er, more blood?
SAURON: What for? Nothing helps! Without my Precious, I'm a Shadow
of my former self!
WITCH-KING: Who, YOU? Never! Sauron, you've got to pull yourself
together...

WITCH-KING:
Gosh, it disturbs me to face you, Sauron
Though I'm the great Morgul-King
Every bad guy'd love to be you, Sauron
Even without the One Ring!
Where has the twinkle gone, oh my liege,
From your terrible Lidless Eye?
Everyone still fears and dreads it, Sauron
Not just Nine Mortal Men doomed to die!

No one's strong like Sauron
Sings fell songs like Sauron
And in snow-flinging no one's arm's long as Sauron's!
For there's no Lord of Darkness so evil
Twisted, abhorred, cruel, and foul
He makes those puny Balrogs look feeble
And he teaches these lost souls in Mordor to howl!

NAZGUL CHORUS:
No one prods like Sauron!
Plays "dark god" like Sauron!
WITCH-KING:
No one stands up like a lightning rod like Sauron!

SAURON:
Numenor really fell for my machinations!

TROLLS:
My, what a guy, that Sauron!
Give five hurrahs, give twelve hip-hips!
WITCH-KING:
Sauron makes the Elves flee Middle-earth in ships!

NAZGUL CHORUS:
No one's breath's like Sauron's
Preys on death like Sauron
SHADE OF AR-PHARAZON:
No one brings on the Akallabeth like Sauron! ....... "

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